Evaluation

I'm evaluating my career. I'm looking at whether or not change is needed to improve my state of mind. I'm looking at something different.

Sometimes change can be beneficial, and then again, it can really mess you up if you go about it the wrong way. If I do this, I risk messing up whatever stability I have. But on the flipside it the benefits to such a drastic move could really help. It could give me hope for my mental well being, and bring up my spirits which will help me fix the other issues I've got - I'm still reeling from the past year and all the misery it brought. The events of the past week at work have been right up there with the crappy days I experienced of late. It's time to change all that.

Should I change my profession completely? Print production is really all I know, and it's a niche market, so I don't know how to progress in that field without leaving town. I don't like that option. I could look outside my comfort zone into areas that are somewhat related, but the uncertainty of that scares me. Fear is a powerful motivator at times, but with my current job still there, I'm not afraid enough to follow this path. I still have a paycheque, and as long as I deal with the crap, I will for quite a while to come.

I thought about going completely freelance, but that's not exactly solid. I can't budget on a hope. Believe me, I've been there, it's not fun. I like doing freelance graphics, the idea of working from home on my terms, with no boss and no pressure gets me quite perked, but again, it' s a huge risk unless you've managed to build a huge customer base. I haven't. I have a few clients, but not enough to pay the bills.

What about a complete direction change? Why not going after something I've never done before? Again, fear is a motivator; I'm afraid of losing the stability for something untried. I'd like to, but feeding my kids trumps the excitement and adrenaline rush of a new challenge.

Then there's always the lottery.

I think I'll wait it out for now, and see what arises. I do have that option. The only real rush is to fix my frame of mind; to keep me out of the loony bin. I have what Kim didn't last year when things got tough - a choice. She took a job she wasn't sure of and really didn't like because we had no choice. At least I still have a paycheque. That's positive, and I'll take it, but I'll open my mind to new things. A career change at 41? A decade or two ago it was unheard of, not now. I have to keep that in mind. Who knows - maybe I'll finally get my dream job!

In other news, the disaster in Haiti has amazed me in the past few days. It amazes me that such a small country that could easily fly under the world's radar, has motivated the same world to help. With all the turmoil we face in our lives, all the worry and fear we experience every day, this country has made us all realize we are extremely lucky and should thank God every day for what we have. Even when we have nothing, we have so much. The people of Haiti have nothing, and now their nothing has been destroyed. It's not fair that these people who have overcome so much pain and heartache since their independence just can't catch a break. It's only right that we help them. And we will continue to help them.

When the earthquake hit we heard about a retired Windsor priest - Father Rene Giroux, was missing, thankfully, he's safe. But that still leaves over 1,000 Canadians missing. With luck, they will all be found, but reality dictates that there may be more Canadians who will not come home. These are people who for one reason or another found themselves in a place with nothing to offer but despair. In the case of Father Giroux, he went there to try to change that. I'm sure that the lives he affected in his time there will thank him, maybe their lives are slightly less desperate with his help. Hopefully, the international aid effort will lessen the despair.

So I start the week with new direction in mind; renewing my own hope for future successes. Similarly, many in Haiti are thinking the same thing.

Cheers.