Tuesday, 18 August 2009

August duldrums

I'm having trouble getting motivated lately. Maybe it's the heat, I don't know. I really have no motivation to get anything done around here, things have proceeded since dad passed away, but now progress has ground to a halt with me. Work is tremendously busy, (good, I guess), which makes for long tiring days. Last night I just vegged on the couch all night.

My son is in British Columbia now. He's off in my father-in-law's truck for a few weeks, like he has done for the past three summers, but this year instead of normal trips to West Virginia, they got the opportunity to haul for Canada Post to the west coast. To make it more interesting, the load wasn't cleared for customs, so they went the long way instead of short-cutting through the northern US. He's having fun, but I can hear it in his voice that he's homesick. I miss him too.

Kim is still home, no job prospects yet, I know that's driving her nuts. She's a worker, a people person. The only person she's had anything to do with lately is our youngest daughter. She won't say it, but I know she wants out of here. Not just to earn a paycheck, but to get back out there with people. They say the economy is starting to turn around, I hope they're right. We need to get back on track. Part of her getting back to work is getting back to normal. Accelerating the end of this really shitty summer.

There is so much I want to do with the remainder of the summer, mostly to give me a sense of normal - a walk in the park, ice cream at the Navy Yard (we do that all the time), swimming, camping again (redo), fix things around the house, visit old friends, etc, etc. We're not doing much this year. Part of the problem is my son isn't home, and it's not the same with him gone. Another part of it is depression and dealing with dad's loss. I know that, I know I need the therapy of activity. But it's easier to think than do. At the end of the day the computer and couch come calling. At least lately anyway, when things calm down at work and I'm not so tired at the end of the day we'll do something, we'll salvage this really shitty month.

I hope anyway.


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